Category Archives: coffilosophy

Is P the New G? New Chav and Toff Single… FSOL or Chas and Dave?

greenYgreyologist cultural anthropologists have been wondering for a while if P is the new G in the greenygrey world. It started when greenYgrey merged with PinkyOrangePurple at the end of XaW Files, becoming gYgPoP, with P drawing level with G at two inclusions. The growth of PoPadom has increased this year with the parodymeter becoming the best techno innovation of the century; this blog post scoring highly.

This new greenYgreyology paradigm shift theory bucks the trend of acronyms and abbreviations by expanding the P being the new G equation to Papua New Guinea. The country of that name has no other connection to the greenYgrey world. It is thought to have narrowly edged out Alpha Papa as the favoured term; a 2013 Alan Partridge film.

Future Sound of London Remixes Past

With absolute disregard for the above, Chav and Toff are releasing their second cover-version single, allaying their fans’ fears that they had split, after Toff was seen flirting with Jacob Rees-Mogg on This Morning; apologising for calling him a s*x god!

Fans of dance music might think it is Future Sound of London’s Papua New Guinea, putting two and two together from the above.

But in line with Toff’s recent behaviour we’re staying on the Chas and Dave theme with Rabbit.

All the above is parody comedy wordplay of course, using real events and culture as props. I don’t consider Toff a pest, and haven’t even seen any of her reality TV or presenting appearances.

 

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Gracie-Greening the New greenYgreying?

After Davina-Deng was declared a Dada-esque greenYgrey I was thinking that Carrie Gracie’s name was pretty greenYgreyish when I heard she’d resigned from her BBC China post because of gender pay disparities. Then Justine Greening resigned from the government cabinet because she didn’t want to move to another position, and I thought oh, what a coincidence, because combining Gracie and Greening’s surnames is like a topsy-turvy greenYgrey.

greenYgrey wordplay

Gracie’s name sounds like grey with an ie/y, while Greening sounds like green with an ing: thus reversing the most popular pastime in the greenYgrey world: greenYgreying.

greenYgrey conspiracy theorists wonder if Justine Greening spotted the connection herself and resigned so I would notice too, and give her the ultimate position: a mention in the greenYgrey world!

Continuing my celebration of Marcel Duchamp, here’s a couple of readYmade photos:

Image result for carrie gracieImage result for justine greening

While it’s a shame these two admirable women had to resign their positions it did provide a return for my favourite greenYgrey-connection politician.

If you loved the above wordplay, XaW Files: Beyond Humanity is full of it!

Davina-Deng Combo like a DaDa Greenygrey Female Name

Two celebrity females in the news recently are Davina McCall and Wendy Deng. I thought that combining their names into a Davinadeng had a DaDa Greenygrey/greenYgrey sounding phonetic ring to it, with a ten-letter word, Ds taking the place of Gs, and two As becoming the dominant vowels over Es; although admittedly, both As are provided by Davina, and the second precedes the second D provided by Deng, so it needs a little juggling about of the letters to make it DaDa.

Image result for davina mccall athlete imagesImage result for wendy deng images

Dada was an art culture passed in XaW Files: Beyond Humanity’s pop-art travel quest theme, which focused more on Marcel Duchamp’s readymades. 

This was just a little comedy wordplay, scoring about 33% on the parodymeter, and I wish both women the best in the present and future.

Latest UFO News Complemented by Historic Astronaut Alien Accounts

In the current social media ‘fake news’ age the truth is ever harder to distinguish, and that’s why I think my parodymeter is a useful tool. I bet Silicon Valley wish they’d thought of it first; which scores very highly on the parodymeter. Elon Musk was too busy building electric cars and space rockets, and missed out on the techno invention of the century; which scores even higher on the parodymeter!!

Los Angeles U.F.O.

Funnily enough, a couple of my main topics from last year were linked in December, when a U.F.O. with a bright massive glowing tail was seen by many residents of L.A. and then explained as a rocket launch by Elon Musk’s SpaceX company.

I think that’s a credible account of what was seen, although I’d have thought there would have been more reporting of it prior to the event, both so people could watch, and to warn those driving etc; as there were reported to have been crashes caused by distracted drivers.

My U.F.O. Research is as a PhD Graduate

Although my third of a trilogy book had an X-Files theme it was more about comedy wordplay than spaceships and aliens. I don’t sensationalise U.F.O.s, and treat them with my PhD research trained scrutiny. I usually put strange shapes on other planets down to geology, and know there’s a lot of space junk out there now, but when astronauts and pilots report U.F.O.s I take notice.

I had largely lost interest in U.F.O.s when I wrote XaW Files, but the new Quest series this year with all the latest footage complemented by historic cases has reignited it. Of course, people with the Discovery channel might have been seeing this much more, with many series such as Ancient Aliens on the channel. 

Some U.F.O. theorists claim NASA hasn’t returned to the moon because there were alien spaceships there, supported by some astronaut testimony, such as Apollo 11’s Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin and Apollo 14’s Edgar Mitchell. I guess like with a lot of theories, time will answer that. If we do go back as apparently planned, and provide credible film footage, then it will disprove that theory.

I am most interested in U.F.O.s that travel at speeds and with movements beyond what humanity has currently revealed; travelling great sky distances in an instant, seeming to disappear and without leaving signs of movement; with a long history of such sightings going back to at least the 1940s, and some recently filmed. Footage released by the Peruvian air force and Chilean navy were two of the most recent encounters with crafts displaying extraordinary manoeuvrability. Their governments apparently have a more open policy about U.F.O.s than the U.K. and U.S.A.

I didn’t know the area I grew up in is a U.F.O. hotspot until seeing some books on Amazon about it a couple of years ago. I once saw a light in the sky on the western horizon, which looked like a star until moving fast, travelling north with erratic disappearing and appearing movements around that time. That was the height of my UFO experience, and the closest I’ve ever been; although I have had bouts of sleep paralysis, which some think explain many close encounters.

If there are U.F.O.s they seem to be quite friendly, as they are quite obviously more advanced if they can ‘study’ us without us knowing much about them; although there have been some reports of life being harmed. We of course harm other life on Earth, but the majority of us try to preserve what we can.

Maybe they are like us with other animals on Earth, studying and preserving us as we do with other life; and if there have been alien crashes, such as reported in Roswell in 1947, then it’s like one of our planes crashing into the sea, or a wildlife park. Maybe we to them are like fish seeing scuba divers or submarines passing their locality in the ocean, or undiscovered tribes seeing our planes flying over them.

For the most part we can just watch and wonder, but sometimes their higher technology will fail them, and they’ll crash into our world. That’s just a little theory though, and I keep an open mind.

I could write that I took my Nazca Lines photos from a UFO in 1994, but in reality it was just from the tower there, and I didn’t even take a flight over them. I was very interested though, but put them down to human construction rather than alien landing sites, as claimed in a best-selling book by von Daniken.

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Happy New Year 2018: Y-Day Rebranded Y-Dawn

Warning: this blog post scores 50% on the all-new for 2018 parodymeter, meaning you have half a chance of taking it all too seriously.

Happy New Year 2018 to all greatolosolous greenYgreyliens and pluckylicious POPolutionaries. Here’s a great gYgPOP scene from the Stonehenge Tours website to wake the new year up:

Image result for sunrise 2018 photos
Stonehenge gYgPOP

It is already more than a fortnight after Midwinter and just over a fortnight until Y-dawn (hot off the press rebranding from Y-day) on January 21st. Y-dawn is the most important date in the mistYmuse calendar, marking the end of the M.I.S.T (Midwinter Ideal Sunrise Times) period (November 21st to January 21st), and beginning of the M.U.S.E (Midwinter Until Spring Equniox) months (January 21st to March 21st).

While the Y did not bring precision balance to the greenYgrey (5-1-4 letters sequence), it did to the mistYmuse (4-1-4), which could be its creator; remembering the symmetry aimed for and achieved by the ancient Egyptians and Incas thousands of miles apart, and apparently without contact, featured previously in the animals and sun spirituality blog.

I know it won’t make a big difference to your life, but hopefully it provides a little extra support for the interested, to mentally and physically survive the four bleakest weather months in Blighty and the northern hemisphere.

As I know from my endurance running, and weights before it, it’s often good to divide training and goals into shorter periods, and I think the winter is similar. We already have many celebrations to pass the end of the year, but nothing much at the start of the year. Now, those who follow this blog do, if they so choose.

In line with my role as mistYmuse PoPPy (Perfect Pagan Prophet) prefect (with a certain amount of self-parody, about 50% on the parodymeter [another new self-proclaimed genius innovation] I’d say), I won’t be doing anything to celebrate Y-dawn, but please do have a good time without me!

My Christmas Message for Veggies

Children of the Quorn
I was veggie before it was born
Fans of Linda McCartney
I wasn’t born when she went veggie.

Children of the Quorn
don’t burn down the nut roast oven
Thank those who cook
and ask if they’ve read my book!

Children of the Quorn
remember on Christmas morn
there’s more to life than presents
but it can wait until after breakfast!!

Quorn was born in 1985.
The poem wordplays Stephen King’s book Children of the Corn, made into a couple of movies.

Chav and Toff the new Chas and Dave

Exciting news, as I’m A Celebrity 2017 winner Georgia ‘Toff’ Toffolo and I have been in the studio with the X-Factor team working on cover versions of Chas and Dave’s classics, cashing in on Christmas, with Ain’t No Pleasing You our first single.

We’re going to be marketed as Chav and Toff, with both names featuring four letters like the Cockney legends. Chav also features the Cha of Chas, while Toff is a champagne Cockney.

In line with the trend of combining celebrity couple names, we’ll be known as Chaff.

Image result for CHAS AND DAVE imagesImage result for CHAS AND DAVE imagesImage result for CHAS AND DAVE images

No, unfortunately the above is self-parody, but my books are original and real, and contain similar comedy if you liked this Chas and Dave Christmas special! I know chaff is generally a negative word in society, and include it for the above disposable comedy rather than for Toff, who I think is very valuable – as a person rather than financially.

 

Happy Solstice, Nature Beyond

Happy Solstice to everybody, with today marking midwinter, the shortest day, with least light and most darkness, because of the way our planet Earth tilts as it travels around our star, which we call the sun. It’s a cloudy day here, with no sun, which looking on the positive side, shows that nature is above and beyond humanity, doing what it wants when it wants, and that we have to adapt our lives to it, rather than the other way around.

It was mainly a celebration because it marked the winter being half over. In the greenYgrey world it is also known as the MIST (Midwinter/Most Ideal Sunrise Time); nature has had the last laugh today, as it is weatherly misty rather than acronymly MISTy, and looking on the bright side of mist, I chuckle along with it.

Sorry if you made a special effort, and wanted sunshine, which is one reason why I don’t make a big deal about it; because I know by now that nature is a law unto itself. There have been many wonderful sunrises and sunsets this winter, and I’ve enjoyed seeing them, and other people’s photos of them online and on television. They’ve all been POP (PinkyOrangePurple) rather than rare red (now known in the gYgPOP twilight vocabulary as rared – a new self-proclaimed genius wordplay word to mark the occasion!).

Responsible Leader not Mindless Follower

Some double-negatives consider me a follower of others, while others think I’m trying to start a cult; maybe some double-negatives doubly-negatively think I’m both.

In fact I’m neither, or a little of each, but no more than any other blogger, or doctor of philosophy ones anyway! My attitude to solstices and other events such as today is proof of that… to me anyway, as I know how I thought, and what I did.

After visiting Avebury and Stonehenge on the winter solstice in the early years of the Greenygrey I saw the opportunity for creating interest, with lots of crowds, and growing each year.

So I could have become a regular, hoping for ‘celebrity’ status, but haven’t been to one on a notable day such as this since.

I thought that although stone circles and other historic structures are amazing, and worth visiting, they are only humanity’s instruments to measure and worship the real deal: nature and the universe.

I am not The Cult; or referencing them for any Cultists

I re-watched The Sky at Night yesterday, and saw/remembered they’d named the new-found aurora light Steve. It has been found since the greenYgrey joined the PinkyOrangePurple in the sky, so I could claim it as the miracle child of gYgPOP, especially as it’s been announced at this special time of miracle birth.

However, I will leave it to the scientific explanation that it’s been there for a while but has only just been noticed because people are taking more photos.

I will just add that I call it Stevie as well, for all the females out there; especially named after Stevie Nicks of Fleetwood Mac and solo artist fame. Here’s some screenshots from the show of Steve/Stevie, which could be interpreted as gYgPOP miracle birth baby photos:

Result of Jesus Wordplay: Je Suis = 100% Sun = 40%

The BBC (David Icke’s devil-worshipping paedophiles?) announced more religion and a broader scope from now on this morning, which judging from the last twenty years of Multicultural Fascism means much more Islam; it’s a numbers game you see, and now that there are a higher percentage of Muslims after twenty years of pandering to their religion and their high birth rate, despite their prophet marrying a 6-year-old and consummating it when she was 9, the BBC will have the excuse to escalate the Islamisation of dear ol’ Blighty even more.

That’s why I will never like or support Islam. I can tolerate a benign Islam, as religion was all becoming benign in Blighty until Tony Blair stirred things up with his religious focus in the New Labour years.

If we’re going to have more religion on the BBC, which means almost certainly more Islam, I think the ‘prophet’s’ personal life should be included all the time, to give it context, rather than leave it as it usually is now: some kind of benign mystical benevolent new revolutionary charity!

Jesus was a Good Historical Figure and Example

There are a lot of people in my demographic who rebel against Jesus, some even going over to the other side: the counterculture kind of devil worship. I think that’s mostly rebellion against hypocritical institutions; Australia has just reported on years of abuse by the (mostly Catholic) Church, schools and sports teams, and Blighty is supposed to be doing the same, justifying my and others like me’s rebellion in the 1980s, although it just seems to be being replaced by a foreign (Islam) version now for another generation; but there are some who may cross over into the traditional stereotype of older establishment Icke-criticising devil worship (seems to be more of it in ‘heavy metal’ now).

I liked Jesus as a rebellious anti-materialist carer, but don’t think he was as special as Christians make out; I think he was just a special person in his time and place, like many people throughout history, all over the world. If the Romans hadn’t brought Christianity back to Europe then Jesus would probably just have been a local hero. Ironically, the Romans went downhill after adopting Christianity, with their empire ending soon after. The same as Egypt when Islam took over from the original monotheist god: the sun.

Not that I think religion should be judged on military success. Sun worship didn’t save the native Americans when the Europeans arrived.

Title Explained: greenYgrey-style Wordplay

There are some people who still think I’m too chavimbo (chav himbo-bimbo) to be the wordplay genius who wrote Werewolf of Oz and XaW Files in a decade-long greenYgrey concept after becoming a doctor of philosophy, and who ran multiple marathons after travelling around the world on a shoestring.

I would list my many flaws, but think I’ll let the double-negatives do some work for themselves, although I have previously written in the mental health genre; it’s not easy being greenygrey!

I liked the Jesus story (when I watched The Last Temptation of Christ recently I wondered if The Pretty Reckless’s devil-worshipping Taylor Momsen was my last temptation?), and thought recently with my focus on the sky about his time on the cross.

Jesus and the Sun

Who did Jesus apparently talk to in his last time on Earth, nailed to the cross after being taunted and tortured by humanity: the sun in the sky.

Moreover, Jesus shares two of his name letters with the sun: the s and u. The 40% of the title. They are in the right order too, and with room at the end for an N to complete sun, instead of the second s.

That would make the name Jesun, sounding like the French Je suis: I am; I sun. However, Je Suis is also Jesus with an extra I: the anagram I Jesus.

Jesus’s Biblical end, on the cross with the sun, could be interpreted as being represented by the Ancient Egyptian Ankh symbol/hieroglyph, which preceded Christ and Christianity by over a thousand years, as David Icke has pointed out similar on stage, in videos previously posted on this site.

The ankh, during the reign of Hatshepsut (1508–1458 BC), from the Royal Ontario Museum

The symbol was later used by Coptic Christians, who have suffered several attacks by Islamists in Egypt in recent times, in an attempt to wipe them out, although some moderate Muslims have supported them.

This representation reminds me of pre-Abrahamic monotheism’s ancient respect for nature, across a world that was not supposed to be connected, as seen in religious symbols from South America and the Middle-East. There were similar beliefs across the rest of the world, in what is now called Australasia.

Manchester City Millionaire

Thanks to Manchester City for promptly paying me the million pounds for winning the war of words with Mourinho before the derby with United last week, meaning they could win the football game as they should have done.

No, unfortunately the above is self-parody comedy, and I’ve got no connection with Manchester City. I didn’t win a war of words with Mourinho as there was none, as there was none between him and Guardiola, as the latter didn’t engage in it, after Mourinho seemed to start it.

I first started my own war of words with Mourinho at the start of last season inspired by other people trying to do the same with me (the Grandmaster ‘battle of wits’ reference that crossed over), to show how ‘one-sided’ battles happen.

If Manchester City had lost the derby, it would have provided ammunition for those who try to engage me in unwanted ‘battles of wit’ as I have done with Mourinho, but City  won the game.

Although I engaged Mourinho in this way mainly to show an example of a ‘one-sided’ battle he does seem to like that kind of management, which is an excuse for me to engage him in such a way.

Maybe that’s what people think about me, and of course they have the right to criticise me in a free democracy. And as Mourinho doesn’t think I’m worthy of responding to, as I’m not in the football profession, I don’t think those who try to engage me in a ‘battle of wits’ are worth bothering with either if they’re not in the professional media world.

As a Communications Studies PhD I probably could have earned a million in PR over the last decade, instead of writing here for you, and trying to achieve a classic work of literature…!